Is success a whole lot more than just proving people wrong? Why is it that you feel the need to prove people wrong and you feel it is time to change it. Well, lets take a look at all the different scenarios in figuring this dilemma out.
I have had the luxury of sitting down with some of the best athletes in the world and one in particular was a former Major League baseball player who had some interesting things to say. I never knew most of the best athletes and movie star in the world are driven by this one thing, to prove people wrong!!!
This anonymous former MLB player told me the #1 reason why he made it to the major leagues was because of his motivation to prove people wrong, which turned him into a determined psycho path competitive killer every time he stepped on the field. Why??? He told me,”he loved feeling like the world was against him versus for him?” It was like when the world was against him he felt he had NOTHING TO LOSE because the world was against him anyways. So this is why he felt free out on the field every time he stepped onto it. But he also told me it had a reverse reaction as well towards everything outside of sports. Meaning he started to question himself if his purpose on earth was solely for only proving people wrong the rest of his life. Later in his 20’s right before getting to the big leagues he said that motivation started to take its toll on him, especially after getting married while having kids.
He began to realize the whole reason why he had this passion to prove people wrong was because he was still looking for the approval of his father, who was not a part of his life his entire childhood. The effect of this was he started looking at everything in his life as NOT GOOD ENOUGH. So he felt he had to prove the world wrong, but on the back side he realized he was doing so because he simultaneously knew his self-concept seen himself as “not good enough.” So imagine living your whole life looking for random strangers to give you that pat on the back saying,”you are good enough, my son!” But never receiving that approval from random strangers, but why would you?
So essentially if you look to prove people wrong, then doesn’t this mean you are actually caring what other people think at the same time? And if you care what others think then you must not believe you are the best, right? If you are NOT TRULY 100% LYING TO YOURSELF? If this isn’t true then imagine right now if you were the most magnificent thing God has ever created on earth and really feel it right now! Then would you still care what others think of you? Exactly, probably not!
So when this former MLB player who spent a quarter of his life trying to get to his “Happiness” which at that time was making it to be one of the best baseball players in the world. Once he reached that pinnacle he told me the first thing that popped into his head was “Is this it?” Is this happiness? Well, it wasn’t for him at that time. His never good enough syndrome spread throughout his life and especially into his family life. He started looking at his wife and kids as not good enough, exactly the way he grew up. Then he looked around and wondered why most of the best athletes in the world were only good at one thing? Being the best in sports but they failed in most of their marriages. Why a Terrell Owens a HOF struggled so drastically in his relationships? So could this be the cause of fully “not loving yourself?” Or is it still possible to prove people wrong as only a motivational factor and not as a substitution for an embedded childhood fear? In conclusion, I guess the answer is each of us must become our own best teachers. Or our own best hitting coaches if you want to put it in baseball terminology? I guess we have to decide on our own if proving the world wrong is a good thing or not.
Watch this video if you are SICK & TIRED of caring what other people think of you. Start at 17:00 is when it gets good.
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Here are a few proving people wrong quotes before you go.